WARNING... THIS POST IS FOR THE LADIES

Just a quick note to you all... Ethan had an X-ray today and everything looks great with his leg, so... Tomorrow, Tuesday morning in Taiwan, He will have surgery to remove the pins! Now, on with the post.

Friday, I saw a woman wearing a shirt with this slogan across the front "Burn the Breast." What in the world does that mean? Does she mean to say, "Hey, I'm hot?" Even I am stumped by the Chinglish. And that reminds me of another lady I once saw. I was walking behind this lady and her hot pink and brown leopard spotted pants caught my attention. She was also tottering on very high heels and had teased the life out of her hair. But the biggest surprise was when she turned around. Her shirt said "Wild Thing" and she was 70 if she was a day. Why on why do I not have my camera when things like this pop up! It would have been a classic photo!

Transformers... real or not

Ethan is totally in to Transformers. He knows their names and knows which one he wants next. He has actually sent me to the Internet to research a certain Transformer because he wanted to know if he was a good guy or a bad guy. Which, by the way, there are millions of site containing the folklore of Transformers. So, the other day when Chris saw a car with a huge Transformer's symbol sticker on its back window, he pointed it out to Ethan. "Hey Ethan, look at that car. It has a Transformers symbol on its window!" To which Ethan replied with a voice full of awe, "IS that a real Transformer?!" After we dashed his hopes and told him no, he quickly moved on to wanting a Transformer sticker for our car. Well, baby, if our car were a transformer, it would transform into a grandpa machine instead of a fighting machine.

Tape that doesn't stick and biases that do

Sometimes, I look at my family and realize that even though we all have US passports, I am the only real American in the bunch. With Chris having grown up over here and my kids in the process of growing up over here (if Ethan can slow down enough to give himself a chance to grow up!), they are somewhat influenced by the world around them. This really came home to me yesterday. Ethan has these four metal post that junt out of his leg and connect to the metal contraption on the outside. Every other day, we need to change the bandages around the post. And the special tape that we got (special because it is suppose to be made to stick to skin) does not want to stick. In my frustration with the tape, I told the kids, "This tape is from some place not good." Abbey replied, "Maybe, maybe it is from China!" Now, while all of my Taiwanese readers laugh, let me explain this to the Americans scratching their heads. Everyone in Taiwan checks to see where things are made. And if the item is plagued with a "made in China" sticker, it is declared to be of horrible quality and assumed to have some strange chemical placed there for the sole purpose of harming the consumers. Some people will not even buy trash bags that are made in China. And my darling daughter, at the tender age of 6, is already aware of product bias. Oh well, I guess with the lead paint scare, the milk scare, the flip-flop scare, and the Red Bull scare, it pays to be informed!

How poodle became a bad word...

A few weeks ago, while we were still in the States, I took the kids to Wendy's to eat. On their kids meal bags, they were featuring different dogs and cats. Abbey and Ethan wanted to know the names of the different kinds of dogs. Things were going great until we got to "poodle". As soon as I told them what it was called, they both began giggling hysterically. I will admit that it took me a few moments to get the joke. Don't worry. If you haven't gotten it yet, you will in a minute. After that, Abbey would ask me, "Mama, what was the black dog on the Wendy's bag called?" I would answer "poodle" and she would look over at Ethan and say, "It was a POOO-dle!" and of course, they would giggle themselves to death. And that is how poodle became a bathroom word and thus banned in our house.

My new helper

A few days ago, a miracle occurred in my house. Abbey came and told me that she was going to give washing the dishes a try. So, I let her wash and rinse and then put the dishes in a big bowl on the side for me to dry (read inspect here). She did a wonderful job and we heaped tons of praise on her. So, then later that night, we had barely finished dinner when she stood up and started collecting our plates. These too, she was going to wash. That was Wednesday and she has washed dishes everyday since. She also very seriously informed me that if I needed dishes washed, I could just ask her and she would do them because "she is growing older and after she learns how to wash dishes, she will need to learn how to drive the car and cook dinner." Well, I think the car thing might have to wait. And I am fully aware that the novelty of washing dishes wears off. (Mine wore off so long ago, I am not even sure I liked it to begin with!) But for the time being, I am enjoying my vacation from washing. Now, when she gets old enough to fold clothes! That will be a day of rejoicing!

A Late Happy Birthday

I had planned on writing this Birthday Blog last week, but then Ethan's trauma came up and it never happened. So, well, now it is happening. Last Tuesday, incidentally, the day Ethan fell, was Chris' 30th birthday. I think my father- in- law summed it up the best when he called me that day. The conversation went like this:

Me: "Hello"
Dad: "Hello and congratulations!"
Me: "Congratulations? What for?"
Dad: "Congratulations on Chris turning thirty!"
Me: "Say what?"
Dad: "Well, now that he is thirty, he will stop harassing you about being thirty!"

And that has been the story of my life since January. Chris has teased that I am old, I have retorted that I can't even run for president for five more years. He has insinuated that my hearing is going in my old age and I have replied that the loss is purposeful and selective. He has referred to himself as "The Young" and I have counted his grey hairs. In fact, on my birthday, he teased me so much that I laughed until I hyperventilated and passed out. (Yet another sign of my "old" age according to Chris.) But that is a story for another blog! Then last Tuesday rolled around and I suddenly got younger. Thirty was just another year. So, Happy Birthday to you, my darling husband, my favorite boyfriend, my pastor, and my best friend. And may peace reign until next January.

Cute things from our three weeks in the States

1. Abbey discovered body spray! She saw a package of 4 at Cato's and wanted to buy it. I don't think that she really knew what it was that she was wanting, but I figured that she would really like it. But the really sweet thing is that she saw some friends that night and wanted to give each of the girls one. Extremely careful consideration was given as to which smells they would like best. She kept Chocolate and Raspberry for herself. One thing for sure is that Abbey has always been a wonderful sharer.

2. On every plane that we were on, when it was time for it to land, Ethan would need to use the bathroom. We could have taken him 20 times in that 2 hour flight and he would still need to go. The poor baby would be crying and wiggling all the way to the gate. Once, we were at the gate and everyone was standing up waiting for them (just who is "them"and why do they take so long?)to open the door. He took one look at all the people and cried out, "Make these people move!" Isn't that what most of us are thinking but just can't say?

3. Abbey saw a snake (outside of the zoo) for the first time. It was in the road and she saw it from the car. After that, she supposedly saw a snake every time she played outside. We would dutifully go and check to make sure that the snake was gone (it always was), but our heart wasn't really into it. We figured that if she really did see a snake, she wouldn't be skipping into the house to tell us about it. She would run hysterically inside, slam the door on whoever was behind her, climb on top of a table and all the while be yelling, "SNAKE". Yes, she is a city girl, thanks for asking!

4. On one extremely early flight, Ethan was full of energy. The lady next to us was teasing Ethan and said, "I wish I had your energy. Can you give me some?" He looked at her like she was out of her mind and replied, "No, energy is in your body. I can't give you any." That's him, logical to a fault.